pink bullets (vawawwee) wrote in funky_stories,
pink bullets

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Frogs in a basket

Jim, a very unattractive frog, was out one day looking for love. He travelled far and wide to find another frog that would look at him without vomiting because he was so disgustingly pukey. But little did he know that he was a special frog... with a special purpose.

One day as Jim was walking through Hippieville, the land of hideous frogs, he heard a voice beyond the trees. This was the voice of an angel. A raspy, phlegmy angel. He hopped along, hoping that this frog would take him in and love his little froggie giblets, but it turned out to be an old dirty hippie lady. She would have been perfect if only she was a frog like himself. He began to mutter to himself, and started to hop away. The old dirty hippie lady heard his rustling among the forest floor, and immediately picked him up.

"My oh my, aren't you the most wonderful frog everr, duuuuuude!" said the old dirty hippie lady. "I wish," said Jim, "I'm a dirty loser frog, no one will love me, everrrrrr!" All of a sudden, Jim noticed an intense look of understanding on the old dirty hippie lady's ugly-as-sin face. "I'll love you frog dude," said the old dirty hippie lady, and she kissed him. "WHOA, DUUUUUDE...." said the old dirty hippie lady "THAT WAS THE FUNKIEST KISS I EVER HAD!" Little did Jim know that the old dirty hippie lady was tripping out because Jim was a 'special' frog. Old dirty hippie lady brought Jim to all of her old dirty hippie friends. Everyone started licking Jim and tripping out. Jim didn't appreciate being licked so they could trip out, but this was the most action he got in his life so he didn't mind. Jim and all of old dirty hippie lady's old dirty hippie friends lived happily ever after in an old dirty hippie shack in the woods... but little did they know that they wouldn't live happily ever after, just happily little while after...

Eventually, the Fuzz busted Jim and all of his old dirty hippie orgy buddies, and they all got arrested for drug posession, but Jim got it worst of all. He was the only frog in history to get the electric chair for posession, but he never regretted it, because he found cheap love from his old dirty hippie friends, and isn't cheap love the best love of all?

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